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Hleb In Savage Territory
If he pulls this transfer off, Alex Hleb will be just as bad as Robbie Savage. The suggestion that a move to Milan from London is motivated by the search for more tranquility blows the old 'I want to be closer to my family' excuse clean out of the water. The cowardly way both have engineered moves has parallels with the way they play the game. Savage kicks his way round the pitch but falls to the ground in faux-agony at every given opportunity. Hleb can do all the fancy trickery but is petrified of actually shooting in case he f***s it up. In very different ways that makes them equally chickens**t.
Savage is beyond redemption, and will probably be remembered as the most despised player of his generation. I wouldn't say Hleb will ever go near plumbing those depths but for the sake of the people, like me, who stood up for him over the last three seasons, it's time he started acting like a man. At this stage I think people would be more receptive if he just said he's moving because he's found a bunch of mugs willing to pay him more for his unique brand of ballet/footballing masturbation than his current employers. If he started showing a little courage then maybe, just maybe, I'd have a teeny bit of sympathy for him when a psycopath in an alice-band (otherwise known as your typical Italian defender) boots him and his lightning feet ten foot up in the air next season. But if things carry on the way they do, it'll be a joy to watch.
William O'Doherty
Give Us Goals Before You Go, Didier...
No one can disagree that Didier Drogba has had some outstanding moments of pure class over the years he's been at Chelsea. And no one can disagree that Didier Drogba has had some outstanding moments of pure petulance, arrogance and idiocy over the years he's been at Chelsea too.
At times he's been the perfect player - strong, quick, good feet and the ability to score some of the greatest goals I've seen at Stamford Bridge. It's just the other side of his game that leaves me believing we'll be better off without him next season. Over the past months the stories of him wanting to leave - join Real, Milan - can't have filled the rest of the team with any confidence. And his comments this morning probably won't go down well with everyone at Chelsea, even though there may be an ounce of truth in them.
I am sure if (or when) he does leave the Bridge, we'll find a suitable replacement, hopefully someone who will play well with Anelka in a two-pronged attack. So I'd like to say thank you to Didier for some wonderful moments, and for being the subject of many debates in this here mailbox. You can't deny he can be an awesome player - it's just the other areas of his game that have let him down. Sticking a goal or two past United next Wednesday will be a great send off, and will mean you are remembered at Chelsea for the right reasons.
Joe Freeman, Chelsea
Starting To Agree With Frank...
The more I think of the City situation the more I begin to agree with Shinawatra. He's bankrolled the team and if he's not happy then he has every right to change the way things are done. I'm not ungrateful towards Sven and he's brought some great times but since Christmas we've been poor and don't get me started on the last day.
Yes, we began the season exceptionally well and the new players bedded in unbelievably quick. Last season's average players were nowhere near the team (Jihai, Vassell, Ball) and no-one knew how to play against Elano or Petrov. The team was on fire and Hamann was rolling back the years to keep the midfield ticking over. We all love Sven. However teams began to isolate Elano and kick him, Petrov began being marked tighter and people began to see that you could take both players out of the game by making them frustrated. Prime example Everton at home where Petrov got himself stupidly sent off. City need a fall back plan however the change in formation did not happen and luckily we carried on in a reasonable fashion through the solid keeper and defence. Then suddenly Johnson gets injured and Hamann is suspended and what happens? Corluka to midfield, disrupting the defence and good as he is he's not a midfielder. The balance has gone and the team in disarray. Here is where Sven needed to earn his money and to be honest he just did not do this. We need formation changes, maybe Elano and Petrov in a 4-3-3 to disrupt opposing teams strategies and new players when the window opened. What did we get? We got a '1 good game in 6' Premiership striker in Benjani and a random Ecuadorian when we could have bought Boro's Alves for less money (we all saw what he could do on the last day.)
Sven's next way to improve the team was to bring Vassell back and then to top it off Sun Jihai! Prime example of a club buying a player to cash in on a different continent. I can see the above problems, my old man who can't even say the players names properly (but that's whole different email) can see them but why couldn't Sve?. Now that the initial knee jerk reaction has calmed down you can see Shinawatra's thinking. He wants to know why, where and how it went wrong. I suspect though that he has found out just like we did when he was England boss that he just does not have a Plan B when things go wrong.
Gavin 'please not McClaren' MCFC
That Crazy Fair Play League Thing...
As a Blackburn supporter I take a perverse pride in our long domination of the wrong end of the Fair Play League (because we are a dirty team in case you haven't heard Arsene's view on this).
My interest in what it actually looks like was only sparked recently at news that Man City had found a possible backdoor qualification for the UEFA Cup via this route. I had previously assumed that it was simply a tally of Red and Yellow cards - although I was always surprised that we could maintain our dominance after the departure of our friends Bellamy, Todd, Savage etc.
If you thought so, too, and are wondering why it is not yet black and white as to whether Fulham have sneaked ahead of Citeh, I suggest you check here (updated up to 36 games when I last looked).
http://www.premierleague.com/page/FairPlayTable/0,,12306,00.html
Hm!Interesting huh? I have not yet been able to fathom out the criteria for 'Positive Play' 'Respect Towards Opponent', 'Respect Towards Referee' or 'Behaviour of Officials' (which I think are the things under consideration as I write) - but, what the heck, I will jump to some conclusions anyway.
I had better confirm that YES we are second worst for Red & Yellow cards before anybody accuses me of whingeing...although that one for MGP for being throttled at Newcastle still makes my blood boil.
What the heck has 'Positive Play' got to do with 'Fair Play'> You can play defensively and still be fair. The fact that Arsenal score highest in this section, with MU and Chelsea not far behind, followed by an approximately general reflection of league placing going down to poor old Derby who score least perhaps suggests that it has more to do with success than either attitude or approach.
I am not sure what Blackburn or Boro do that is particularly bad in terms of 'Respect to opponents'. Maybe the players wear those electric buzzers as they shake hands at the start of the game!
'Respect towards Referee' should of course catch out Chelsea and I am pleased to see that they are actually lowest scorers - just edging out errrr Boro and Blackburn (again). Maybe Jason Roberts shouldn't smile, or Santa Cruz shrug, so much when they are called offside.
At least 'Behaviour of Officials' should catch out those yobs at Man Utd constantly haranguing the fourth official at the touchline, making comments about referees on TV etc but, hang on, they are 8th in that section! Ah yes, and Rovers are bottom of that section as well - by quite a handsome margin from...Aston Villa - will you stop jumping up and down when you score Mr O'Neill! Fair play to yer man Roy Keane who tops this section. In fact a quick calculation would say that if Sparky and his mates behaved as well as Gary Megson's riff-raff (who would, of course, have much less to get excited about) we would be right on the tail of Man City!
My apologies if the exact details of my analysis are wrong, but this was done while eating lunch and without bothering to print out the table.
So who is making the multi-million pound decision on whether it will be Man City, Fulham, West Ham, Wigan or...(having sent flowers to the referee before the Brum game), Blackburn make that last UEFA Cup slot - and on what basis?
Chris 'Now Glen Keeley really knew how to get sent off in style' Ryan, Singapore
Liverpool To Challenge For The Title? Hell Yes...
So Steven Gerrard thinks Liverpool can challenge for the title does he? Well I for one agree with him.
Now before you all start laughing, let me clarify that I don't believe for a second that Liverpool will win the league next year. A massive contradiction of my opening gambit surely? Well, not necessarily.
Last season Liverpool finished a whopping 21 points behind the champions. This season, as everyone knows, that deficit has been cut to just 11 points (still a significant gap of course). A more telling statistic perhaps though is that last year Liverpool were defeated on ten separate occasions in the league, five more than Manchester United, whilst this season Liverpool suffered only four defeats (one fewer than the champions who again lost five).
Most scousers wont need reminding of course, that two of those four defeats came at the hands of their arch rivals too and it doesn't take a rocket scientist to deduce that, had Liverpool beaten Manchester Utd in those two encounters, they would have finished above them. It may seem like I'm clutching at straws here and in no way am I suggesting that Liverpool were only two performances away from being a better side than Man U. As Gerrard rightly points out, it's not losing those big games that necessarily costs us our title challenge every year, it's failing to pick up maximum points against lower league teams whenever we start to play poorly. It's clear to see when you notice that our campaign is derailed over the course of a month or two each year.
Setting aside those four defeats then, there are very few occasions I can think of where we drew a game we deserved perhaps to lose (Spurs at home springs to mind) but plenty of times where we could easily have won had we been more clinical and either snatched a late goal or killed a game off whilst on top in the way United do (Man City away, Chelsea home, Villa home, etc). Put simply, the margins at the top are very tight and to be the best you have to take your chances. Chelsea have proven this year that you don't have to spank teams week in week out to challenge for the honours (though Liverpool's best ever Premiership goal difference would suggest we have handed out a few spankings this season). Simply being one goal better than the opponents on a consistent basis can suffice.
Too often this year Liverpool have been the better team, but the better team by less than the sum of one measly goal. Will Liverpool become better at this than the sides above them next year? Probably not (Man U and Chelsea wont exactly be resting on their laurels). But can they once again, show improvements on the previous years endeavours and give Man U and co a run for their money? Why the hell not.
Matt Houston ('Liverpool will NOT win the league next year')
Hail Caesar, You Prat
Could someone please hand Caesar Mongragon a length of rope and give him a helpful push?
I had to watch Schindler's List to try and cheer myself up after his contribution.
Dave (I bet he's normally a bag of laughs...) K
...Can I suggest to the idiot Caesar Mondragon that he takes up watching netball if football depresses him so much.
Derick Yates
...Anyone else think that Caesar Mondragon ain't been getting any lately??
Andy Bull
...It's rare of find someone who reaches new levels of thought and originality. Unfortunately, in this case it wasn't a good read.
Caesar Mondragon, your little piece had more holes in it that my old pyjamas. I would say that this hasn't been a vintage season but let me respond to your expert analysis:
1) Three teams have to get relegated every year. It's in the rules. So of course three teams are going to look back on the season with regret. It's not the PL's fault that Derby got promoted 'too early'. Blame West Brom.
2) Fulham fans probably know that Hodgson won't buy a load of average Northern Irish Championship players for next season.
3) The league isn't fair? Is that a fact? I suggest you check out that funky website (rightresult.com?). If the league was truly fair and square, JT wouldn't allowed to play as 'keeper no. 2, Essien wouldn't be allowed to attempt an 'Eduardo' every match and Drogba would get what he deserves.
4) So Everton haven't been in the top 4 recently? Oh no....
5) Chelsea deserved to win it? How, exactly? Because of the flair and excitement they provide every week? Because of their upstanding behaviour and all round nice-guy image? Do me a favour...
6) Perhaps the boulder should be pushed down the hill in your direction, to put you out of your misery. Go and watch some rugby league or something.
Beano, Kent
...In response to Caesar Mondragon's (Comedy Name? Pretentious Moi?) email about what a poor league it's been, it couldn't possibly be because hes just bitter that the best team won could it? We had a thrilling relegation battle which produced the astonishing escape of Fulham (1-100 to go down two weeks ago - nothing outta the ordinary there Gus, sorry Caesar) and a title race that wasn't decided until 10 minutes from time. The fact that the title was won by the team that scored the most goals and conceded the fewest whilst playing football that was beautiful on the eye must indeed have been galling for poor ole Mr Mondragon. Chelski's all-out attacking tour de force style was more to his liking apparently. The man is obviously some sort of intellectual giant.
Marty 'who's at the door, not bleeding Alba again, thought I told her to do one' McCormick
Villa Fans Very Happy Thank You...
'For the Villa fans who had to endure watching their team score from corners and free kicks all season without a whiff of a goal from open play...'
Yeah, I don't know how we managed to 'endure' watching our team scoring so many goals! God, it was awful, seeing Ashley Young and Gareth Barry setting up goal after goal after goal. How did we cope?
Also, not a whiff of a goal from open play? What utter rot. We may have scored a high proportion of our goals from set-pieces, but we scored plenty more from open play. And even if we hadn't, I wouldn't care; we played great football this season, and took part in so many fantastically entertaining games. Having sat through the s***e that Graham Taylor and O'Leary served up for us, this season has been anything but a disappointment.
Ian Symes, London Villan
Go Rangers...
I hear there's a big game going on in Manchester tonight, hordes of Scots have poured over the border and are making Manchester a very colourful scene today.
I must confess it's great to see the Union flag in all its glory.
Nothing much else to say except I hope the fans have a great time here and walk (or stagger) away with the cup.
Andy G, Cheshire Chelsea - Go Gers!
Man Being Pushed Into Canal: Not Funny
In response to Mark, Manchester. So, some local guy was out riding his bike on a Sunday afternoon minding his own business probably not too far from his home and some pis*ed-up northern monkey shoves him in a canal? Wow, that is a funny story from football. Just like the time I saw a bloke get punched in the face outside Upton Park.
Chris, Winchester
...I've forwarded your story to the FA, and look forward to hearing about the three point deduction for Manchester United failing to control their fans.
Now that would be a story that made me laugh.
James Parrish
